Lifestyle

Thirty years after women became 50 percent of the college graduates in the United States, men still hold the vast majority of leadership positions in government and industry. This means that women’s voices are still not heard equally in the decisions that most affect our lives. In Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg examines why women’s progress in achieving leadership roles has stalled, explains the root causes, and offers compelling, commonsense solutions that can empower women to achieve their full potential.

Ladies, I have to admit that I was a strong critic of Sheryl Sandberg, however, I spent my evening on Sunday reading her controversial book ‘Lean In‘ and I am sold, completely. Sheryl Sandberg reminds me that there is a strong case for women empowerment, changing the ratio in leadership and on the political front. If women are not in positions of power, how do we expect to be part of the decision-making process that will ignite change, remove institutional barriers and spur our financial independence. It’s a shame that 78% of Bachelor’s degrees awarded today goes to women, but we still have fewer women in leadership and political roles. The blunt truth is, men still run the world. Of the 195 independent countries in the world, only 17 are led by women. And that to me is why we cannot overcome the institutional barriers that hold women back, because there aren’t enough women in power. 21 of Fortune 500 CEOs are women, and we wonder why maternity leave policies have remain stagnant? If women don’t rise to power, nothing will change and this includes the assault/marginalization of women in developing and emerging countries – a cause that is so dear to my heart.

With staggering statistics, hard data, and academic research, Sheryl Sandberg makes her argument for the top reasons why women hold back. Aside from insecurities and the feeling of fraud that most women feel just like her, she urges women to press on.

“I still face situations that I fear are beyond my capabilities. I still have days when I feel like a fraud. And I still sometimes find myself spoken over and discounted while men sitting next to me are not. But now I know how to take a deep breath and keep my hand up. I have learned to sit at the table.”

Drenched in self-doubt and “feeling like a fraud,” women consistently underestimate themselves and their abilities. For a host of reasons, women often hold themselves back by not sitting at the table where decisions are made. Instead, they choose to watch from the sidelines. These gender stereotypes start at a young age says Sheryl.

“The gender stereotypes introduced in childhood are reinforced throughout our lives and become self-fulfilling prophesies. Most leadership positions are held by men, so women don’t expect to achieve them, and that becomes one of the reasons they don’t. The same is true with pay. Men generally earn more than women, so people expect women to earn less. And they do.”

Women need to continue to aim high after college. The idea of staying home to raise kids without having any kind of fulfillment, be it a career, business, startup or learning a trade is what makes things complicated not just for other women but our own daughters. Because, we are sending a message that “this is what a woman looks like” and “this is what a woman should do for her husband and/or family”. Like I mentioned in a blog post, we need to empower men to share the household chores at home from day one of marriage. Because, it’s everyone’s God given right to aim high and to achieve their fullest potential.

It’s funny because I meet a lot of women my age who are young, talented and blessed with beautiful young kids. These women love their family as much as I love mine, but they choose to stay at home while their husband’s work. They complain about how the society is unfair to women or how they are home cleaning and cooking while their husbands are working. They sometimes resent their role as women for this very reason. Some of them are not happy with staying home but they do because either their husband has communicated to them that he would prefer they stay home or due to financial reasons. However, women need to position themselves for career success with or without kids. My daughter is my greatest joy but I will never be happy staying home all day with her, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself or even with her. I also want to raise her to be a great leader. Girls who are outspoken and confident in their abilities are referred to as ‘bossy’ while that behavior is expected of boys. I want my daughter to grow up in a gender-free world where there is no boundaries to who she can become. And that starts with everyone, no matter what your title is.

Have you read Lean In? After reading some parts of the book, I realize that Sheryl is not talking about leaning into one’s career only, she actually emphasizes leaning into whatever it is that makes you happy but doing it in a way that empowers women not one that promotes gender stereotypes and consequently hold women back. I am not finished yet, so expect to read more of my thoughts on the blog soon.

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